Talking it out

Have I mentioned in this whole blog how amazing my husband is? Well he is. It is funny how sometimes you do not want to talk about things. They will just go away if you don't, right? I am glad to have a husband who will push me. Push me to talk to him about those things I have tucked away. He is right. It hurts when you talk about them but it feels better the next day. I am thankful God spoke to him to poke at me a little and get me to talking. This is just my way of really letting him know how thankful I am for him. He may not be a chef but he has so many other special things about him that make me love him so much. Thank you baby!

The Beautiful Lady Has Sung.

Weeks and weeks, night after night, she worked so hard. Just to tell you how long it's been, I went with her for "callbacks". It's the round after the first audition where they start figuring who gets what part. It wasn't warm enough yet for flip flops. And I love wearing flip flops. For weeks she spent multiple nights a week rehearsing. Spent lots of money traveling back and forth. Never giving up when some things didn't go her way. She missed it too much. She loved doing it too much. Even though she came home sometimes exhausted, frustrated, angry, sore, six nights over the last two weekends made it all worth it. Made it worth it for both of us. Her, because obviously this was why she spent the time, money, energy, effort. To be under the lights, friends she loves and those she hasn't met watching her perform. Me, because I got to watch her for the first time. I'd heard her sing before. She'd sing along with Carrie Underwood when we to see her in concert. She'd even sing along in the car (I gotta take that B-52's cd and hide it somewhere). She even sang at church sometimes. Those were cool. But this was different. Watching it be her turn, this was cool. Now, the program will tell you she wasn't the "lead" performer, but that's subjective. I know several people who thought she was. Which leads me to...

Thank you so much to everyone who came to the finale night. Gas is expensive, no one else we know lives near Lewisville, a record breaking heat wave all told everyone to stay home, stay indoors. But there were so many people who didn't listen. They wanted to see her. And it meant so much to me. It meant even more to her. She was tired, she was a little ready for it to end. (She napped for like 7 1/2 hours earlier in the day) But knowing how many people made the effort, spent the gas, took the time to come see her, gave her a little boost. Way better for your heart than a RedBull boost, this was Lindsay knowing she was loved. What was so amazing, the majority of those who came, were friends of mine. I was blown away at how many people showed up for her. I was sitting behind them all (seeing the show 4 times before that night, I didn't mind surrendering the best view to someone else), I got a little teared up when I looked around at how many people came so far, were sweating so profusely to support my wife. Once she catches up on her rest enough (probably just in time to do another musical), I hope it sinks in to her how much she is loved, by those who quite honestly don't have to. The last couple of weeks she's been watching the scales so closely. Working really hard at lowering the number that pops up. I've been working really hard at convincing her that whatever number does pop up, it has absolutely no impact on how beautiful she is, how much I love her. My hope is that she sees that even though she didn't have the "lead role", there are a lot of people, many who aren't in our "tree", that will travel great distances and sit in syrup-thick humidity to see her come alive. No matter how high up her name appears on the program or how low the number on the scale is, she is deeply loved, exactly the way she is.

The father of a righteous man has great joy; he who has a wise son delights in him.

For anyone who reads this on a regular, or any really, basis, this will seem very strange. Not only is it not going to be about me/us, it will have no hint at all of Colorado. My friends Jamie and Jennifer Webster have done something similar to what we have in this blog. Only the topic of theirs is nearly two year old Caden, their son. It's really cool, since Caden hasn't quite mastered blogging yet (though I'm sure it won't be long), it's a snapshot into the world of Caden Webster. There are a ton of pictures as you can see if you click on the link, but as I was looking at it the other day, there was one that jumped out at me and hasn't left my mind for very long since.

What fantastic moment that was captured. I don't know what they were talking about. I can't even tell you for sure if they were talking at all. But there is such a look of absolute adoration, on each side. Jamie is so focused on his son, and whatever the moment is about, Caden is engrossed in his father. There is such beautiful scenery around, and none of it's noticed. The only thing that matters in that moment is each other. So many kids, way too many kids don't have any moments like this. And Caden may never fully comprehend how much his father adores him. But this is such an authentic, honest, powerful statement. I have a ton of great friends, probably more than my share. There are handful who when they have/will become fathers, I don't worry at all. I pray for them, but not in a concerned, "Lord please help this kid, I know too much about his dad." Caden is not one of those children. The moment Jamie told me they were pregnant with him, I thought, "that will be a well loved, encouraged, and strong boy/man." And then you have these moments, luckily captured with a camera, to prove that. The son looks up to his father, and the father looks upon with pride, love, and unfiltered joy. This is such an example of Christ-like love, I guess that's why I can't get this picture out of my mind.

Jamie is one of those people that no matter where he goes, no matter who he's around, he fits in without compromising his true self. Everyone loves him. Everyone should. I've often said, "if you spend 10 minutes with Jamie Webster and walk away not liking him, it's your fault". No one knows that more than Caden. And no one cherishes Caden more than Jamie. I've just never seen a better picture of fathering well. And I'm not in the least bit surprised by it.

"If I die, don't you dare play 'Go Rest High' and dedicate it to me!!"

Friday, May 16th is a day a lot of people around here remember, for the wrong reason. On that day in 2002, my friend, your friend, our friend, Paul Franklin was taken from us. See, that's the gut reaction description. His work was finished here. He did a lot of good work. He influenced many a man, boy, woman, girl. And on 5/16/2002, he was called away. For some reason we've chosen to mark the anniversary of the accident that took his, and two other wonderful souls-Tom and Isolda Temples in the same accident. I don't really understand why the day that they left us is more noticed than the day he was born, or the day he first became a father, the day he won one of three CMA awards. I can promise you from the inside, those were much more joyful days. We will, along with many others tomorrow, cry a little bit, but hopefully laugh a whole lot more. The number one thing I hear from listeners when they come to see us at events and appearances, "It just hasn't been the same since...". They're absolutely right. Rather than letting that reflect an emptiness in our lives, I'd rather it reflect the presence that we had once. The reason we feel a void now is because Paul was that special, that rare and a 6 foot, five inch gift. We are not less for not having him with us today, we're more for ever having the chance to cross paths with him. Would it be better if he were still with us? Maybe. But who am I to ask someone to leave the side of Jesus now that he's truly home.
CS Lewis wrote a journal after his wife (who he refers to as "H") passed away from cancer. In "A Grief Observed", he writes:

Praise is the mode of love which always has some element of joy in it. Praise in due order; of Him as the giver, of her as the gift. Don't we in praise somehow enjoy what we praise, however far we are from it? I must do more of this. I have lost the fruition I once had with H. And I am far, far away in the valley of my unlikeness, from the fruition which, if His mercies are infinite, I may some time have of God.. But by praising I can still, in some degree, enjoy her, and already, in some degree, enjoy Him. Better than nothing.

If you'd like to see pictures and hear old audio clips of Paul, please visit here.

Babies here, babies there, babies everywhere!

There's a saying around the station (and probably other places) that says bad things (deaths) come in three's. Well, I have good news, sometimes babies do too! While I'm going to have a tough time working Colorado into this post, (no wait, that picture of Kory and me was taken in Denver...whew!!), I'm so thrilled to share the news that my friend of over 25 years, my brother in Christ, one of my favorite people in the world, is about to have his first child. His wife Blair (who also is one of my favorite people in the world) is due in December. As of last night, everyone is doing just fine. She's already having crazy cravings. I'm just so thrilled for them both, it'll be their first.



It'll be the second child for my boy Tom White. I can pretty much copy all of the things I said about Kory, and apply them to Tom. With the exception of how long I've known him. They both will be just phenomenal fathers. Tom has a little more experience than Kory does, but I'm not worried at all about any of these kids. They will be surrounded by love, strength, wisdom, and compassion. They are in the best of hands.

Also I found out this week that my friend Jill in Cary is expecting as well. See, good things come in three's as well!!

"So what is it you guys do?"

...is the question I often get when I talk about my "small group", "band of brothers", whatever you want to call it. The group of men I get together with every Thursday night. And sometimes times away from Thursday night. We get together, we eat. We catch up. And as the meal is setlling, this is our purpose. One of my brothers, Matt, found this. And it's a perfect description of what we're trying to do:

A band of brothers is a group of men who were tired of life as usual. Men who were tired of feeling weak and ashamed and addicted to whatever brings a temporary escape from the pain, emptiness...or boredom. Men who wanted to come through for their wives, their children, their friends and their God, but whose lives were marked by frustration, depression, insecurity, and failure.

A band of brothers is a group of men who were tired of pretending. And so they stopped. They found a few other men with whom they could be completely transparent, guys with whom they could unload about all their shame and failures, all their fears, and all their weaknesses...men who, when they were done spilling their guts, would still be standing there saying, "What else you got?"

A band of brothers is a group of men who have traded their weakness for Christ's strength and their self-obsession for Christ's selflessness. Men who daily fight for one another, trading the enemy's lies with God's truth. They've joined arms with one another and joined ranks with eternity's Freedom Fighter, Jesus Christ. In Him they fight for the freedom of their wives, children and friends. It has become their life's passion, mission and purpose. Unified in Christ, these bands of brothers move with humility and courage towards total surrender, total trust and total commitment to the One who gives LIFE and who has overcome death.

A band of brothers is a group of men who've tasted the abundant life Christ came to bring. They've begun to realize their place in God's story. And now they want more...for themselves, for their families and friends, all for the glory of God.

The term 'band of brothers' was coined by Shakespeare in Henry V

"We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition.
And gentlemen in England, now a-bed,
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here;
And hold their manhoods cheap, whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."


It really is the coolest thing. Look for it, there are more who want more.

Joys in My Life

Yesterday was such a nice day! The weather was perfect and I had my first "happy" rehearsal with the musical. I actually got to hang out with just the girls and dance and had a great time! Above is a picture of me and Marc in Jamaica under the Bottlebrush tree. Now before we left my brother told me, "Every time you go under the bottlebrush tree you have to kiss." Marc loved the idea and so did I of course when we got there our butler looked at us like we had lost out mind the first time we went under it and stopped to kiss. She said that wasnt a true saying. Oh well we continued it throughout the honeymoon. So joys in my life. I love being able to spend time with people who have kids! They are just so much fun. I love hanging out with friends for dinner or games or even just an afternoon of hiking. I love the stage. I love feeding off of the audience and hearing them clap or laugh or even cry at something you are portraying on stage! I love waterfalls and being able to hear the sound they make. Sometimes a loud thunderous noise and sometime just an wonderful tiny trickle. They are all amazing to me. I love my husband. I love the way that he will expose himself to me and trust me with his heart. So anyways I just wanted to write about a few things that make me happy because yesterday was a very good day!