"I am well pleased"

No, I didn't tell her to write that. And no, she didn't get that picture from me. But I'm sure pumped that my wife, my best friend, one of the best things (short of salvation) that's ever happened to me, is just as stoked about a trip to my most cherished place in the world as I am. I don't know what excites me more. That I get to go. That I get to go with her. That I get to go with her and it makes her heart come alive. But as excited as I am. As annoyingly excited as I am (I always have to point out a Colorado license plate when we're going down the road, I really can be obnoxious about it), there is one thing that I love looking at more than Rocky Mountain National Park - Emerald Lake included.

I love watching my wife love things. The last two nights I've been treated to a real treat. Most nights watching American Idol I want to go sit in the oven for a while to distract me from the pain of the show (but I have to watch it, so I make the best). But this week they had Andrew Lloyd Weber on. Broadway songs. I, like probably most people watching didn't know a single word of a single song. My wife did. She even guessed right on most of who was going to do what. She....LOVES Broadway. She loves being a part of musicals. She loves being on stage and performing. Hiking is to me as the theatre is to her. And to get to watch her watch that, was just great. Then the next night we saw the musical "Rent". It was in town and she mentioned wanting to see it. Luckily I was paying attention in that moment and got us tickets. I didn't get most of the play. I mean I think I got it, but there were parts I was lost. And I was really trying. But every now and then I'd glance beside me and see Lindsay's face. That...that daze she was in. That pure joy and fire that ignites when she either watches musicals (much less performs in them), that is simply the most special thing I've ever witnessed. And I've seen some pretty cool stuff. So ask me my favorite sights of all time up to this point. #2, without a doubt, Emerald Lake. #3, Lone Pine Lake. You get the point. But as good as those are, they're laps behind watching my beautiful wife enjoy something. Watching her come alive...makes Broadway cool.

Oh...I almost forgot....

One Place I would Rather Be.......

I know Marc is going to love this one. I am so ready to go out to Colorado it is eating at me! I am ready to get away from all of the things that weigh us down here in NC. Being able to just get out in the middle of no where and experience things the way God intended them. His beauty. His amazing eye for detail. His knowledge of my love for waterfalls and making them more amazing than one can imagine in Colorado. I am just ready to get to experience silence. I cannot remember the last time I was able to just sit and enjoy God's creation and love for us by providing us an amazing playground. As some of you know I went to Western Carolina University. I loved being in the mountains because I could just get away and enjoy the beauty God created. It was amazing. I have been reading lately where there is a lot of development going on up there. There is some big company wanting to make 3 golf courses and build 200 plus homes on 4,000 acres of land. I cannot imagine trying to get away and experience the peace of what God created while looking out over a mountain top and seeing huge houses and not land God created. People are so greedy with wanting to have a bigger house and more this and more that but they do not even take a look at what is being used now. If people would take a moment to look at the houses that sit vacant or the golf courses that no one is really playing on they would see why there would be no reason to build a new one. I guess I just dont understand how someone can build something brand new beside something that is already there and not being used. Take strip malls for example: There are so many places where businesses have gone out of business and left a big parking lot and huge open building. Why is it that these companies cannot put less money into changing the standing structure into what they want it to look like. I mean it will only be a few years before that business goes down in flames as well. I just dont see the need to build new houses when we have hit a 16 year low on new home sales. I am thankful for National Park Land that does not get touched but why would someone want to go to a National Park to look out across the untouched land when they will soon be looking at someones huge million dollar house or golf course. I just think it is not needed. Sorry to ramble but I am just tired of people abusing the land we were put here to protect and live off of.

The best loves are sometimes the hardest to accept

I can't help but wonder, how many times have I just missed it? How many times have I missed Lindsay's heart? How many times have I been so caught up in myself and what I want to do, what's important to me in the moment that I just blow it? Not that she would complain. That's what makes it so self frustrating. She's not hard to make happy. She's not highly demanding. We've had talks of moving to Colorado (pictured left...like you didn't know that), and she is just so supportive and ready to pack the bags. Yet I can just about promise you, day after day, I miss an opportunity. It's not blatant. It's not even on purpose. The day can drain me some days. The mental, spiritual and physical fatigue, I often use as a subconscious scapegoat. "Just let me get to the weekend, and we can spend some real time together away from the tv. Just let us get refreshed and then I'll experience her." But then the weekend gets here and often times, I find another excuse.

I tell her often that she's pretty. I don't do it out of obligation, I do it because I look her and think, "there's the feminine image of God, right here in front of me." I tell her I love her all the time. Sometimes I'll tell her that, she'll answer back, and we'll go back to being silent. Or going back to talking about whatever we were talking about. There's a line from a movie, "I got so busy trying to do my job, that I forgot to do my job." I wonder how often I don't do my job as a husband well enough. I can never do it to the level she deserves, only Jesus could love her as much as she deserves. Do I lead her spiritually enough? I can honestly tell you we don't pray together as much as we should. We'll both tell you that if we speak with any semblance of honesty. And I'm not even going to use the "well it's hard to love someone everyday" cop out, because that's exactly what it is. She loves me well. Everyday. So it's not that it's hard so it's ok to not, she doesn't ever fall back on that. And it's not that I'm horrible to her. I really do think I'm pretty good. But as good as I can possibly be, I'm still going to miss it sometimes. As intentional as I can be, there are still going to be moments that I don't get it right. I try really hard. I don't always try hard enough though. And it scares me because she is so loving, so understanding, so patient, and so unselfish that she may not point out those times to me, causing me to miss them all over again.

In the first few weeks we were married I drove myself crazy trying to think of new and creative ways to show her how special she was to me. I didn't want to ever take her for granted, I didn't want to get lazy so I'd beat my head against the wall trying to be so clever, that I'd miss time with her or moments where she just wanted me. And I really think that's been one of the more difficult lessons to learn. I should say to believe. That I really am enough for her. I don't have to be clever or grandiose all the time. Once in a while, sure, she likes being swept away as much as the next girl. But she doesn't need it. Not every day. She just wants the intimacy. She just wants the relationship.

And then it dawns on me, that's a lot like my walk with God. I don't have to come to church dressed up in a suit and tie to have a relationship with Him. I don't have to sing along with every song in order for Him to want to know me. Lindsay doesn't need a bubble bath every night to love me. After a while it would be about the obligation and the routine rather than the heart of it. Same thing with God. If I'm just going to church because that's what you do on Sunday mornings, then I'll miss Him. But if I go to really worship Him, really try to connect with Him, really try to learn about Him through the message, that's what He's after. He's a lot like Lindsay that way. Lindsay's a lot like Him that way. They both just want me. As my good friend Steve Lynam says, "Taking me as I am without leaving me where I am." It's hard to believe sometimes that Lindsay really will love me just because. Sound familiar?

Days Passing By

Could this day get any longer? This has been the longest day. To make it go faster I thought I would add a new blog today. I went by last night and met Kristin's beautiful children. They are some of the most precious children I have met in a while. Lady Erin, Princess Madison and King Griffen! It was so good to get to see her and speak about a book we are wanting to dive into. It is great to have someone to go to! By this of course I mean women wise. So I also called Josie, my prayer partner from this weekend. She wasn't home at the time so I just told her dad to call me back. She has moved back to Maryland so it will be crazy trying to keep in touch! I started my new position here at SilkRoad. I now work in support and help people with their problems with programs. It is actually quite fun. I feel challenged during the day and I like it very much. I get to learn new things every day. There is always something to catch on to here in the Support Department. I have musical rehearsal tonight. Doing Oklahoma! again but this time in Lewsiville at the town square. Above is a picture from last time! The last weekend of May and the first weekend of June will be SHOWTIME! If you are able you should come and see the show. It is family friendly and you can even bring a picnic and watch the show. It is outside! Under the stars! What better way to watch Broadway then under the stars! Get in touch with me if you would like more information! Well I think I have taken up some of my time so I am going to end this one! Thanks for reading my rambling.

You Will Never Be Thirsty Again

Marc is right! What a weekend I had. I went with the ladies of Grace Community Church and some of their friends to Montreat for the Women's Retreat. I can honestly say after the argument that Marc and I got into on Thursday I did not want to go. I wanted to be able to spend time with him. I knew that I needed to go because I had a dehydrated heart.

LuAnn Prater is an amazing woman and speaker. She talked to us about the "Woman at the Well". She had been through so much in her life that she didn't think she deserved much of anything. Jesus, a Jew, came to her as a Samaritan woman and asked for a drink. She wondered why he would speak to her since she was a half breed and not like Him. Jesus told her to go get her husband and this woman was open about how she was living life and Jesus was glad. He knew everything about her already. He offered her something she could not comprehend to begin with. This is paraphrased of course but he said, "I can give you water that will allow you to never thirst again." Well when she heard this she wanted to drink of this water. She went and told everyone in the town that this was the Messiah and that he had spoken to her. Others believed her and came to see Him as well.

Well I learned that as this woman had a past and things that hurt her heart I did as well. I needed to completely and utterly give it up to the Lord. I felt that I had in the past but recently it has been coming back into play. Well I can tell you I left that on the cross at Montreat. LuAnn had made a cross and we nailed our pain to the cross to leave it there. It was amazing how I felt after that.

Well another woman shared about her past. She had never confessed it to anyone and she shared it all with us. Her story was amazing and everyone in the place was crying. She had made a picture of her crying out "Daddy" to the Lord with a big red heart and said she struggles still with the fact that God loves her. We had free time after lunch that day and my room mate and I went to town to go shopping. We went in this little store and I was looking at some jewelry. One stuck out to me in particular and it was a Red Heart. I knew I was supposed to get that for this woman. I had not been thinking about earlier that morning while shopping but I knew I was supposed to give this necklace to her. When I did see her and had the chance to give it to her she teared up and told me that earlier, after she shared her story, someone spoke with her and told her she needed something to remind her of this weekend. Remind her of the freeing event that is was and something to help her to know it was truth when Satan tried to make her believe it was a lie. When I heard this I just thought, "Wow! He picked ME to help her remember. She picked ME even with my past to help someone else"

I will tell you what the weekend just got better after that! I shared with others what had been holding me back and actually was comforted by the outpouring of love and support. I can now say that I have a story that I can share with others. I am a Woman of God and he loves me as I am. No matter my past or my size. He loves me! His Princess. He loves me enough to place women in my life who are going to lift me up. I had not met my room mate before this weekend and it was amazing just how much we had in common. He put us with each other so that we can form a bond to not only help heal our hearts but help to heal other hearts as well. We are actively seeking a Bible Study for healing. We would like to find a book that talks about women's pain in general and healing and leaving on Lord for comfort. If anyone knows of a good book let me know! Of course if any women reading this would like to join let me know as well. No matter your struggle or pain we want to be there. Isn't that was friends are for?

I know this one was long but so much went on this weekend! I can't right it all down here but I know that I am a new creation in Christ and he loves me! That is one thing I will never forget! The Lord works in ways we know nothing about and for that I am grateful.

Drinking from the well

I wasn't kidding about the Colorado pictures. This one is my favorite place on Earth. The whole thing. No, I haven't been everywhere, but this is it. It's Emerald Lake. If you came to the wedding, recognize it? It was my groom's cake. They made a cake out of this place. It was remarkable. I didn't want to eat it. I didn't want to mess it up. Good thing, 'cause I didn't get to eat it anyway.

Yes, Carolina got smacked. According to Tarheel Marcus Ginyard after the game, "I knew something was wrong when we would foul them and then we'd huddle up and nobody would say anything. It would take four or five seconds before anyone spoke. Everyone just looked at each other like, `What the heck is going on?' It was weird. We were just looking around like, `Whoa.'". Kansas came out and smacked them and they didn't know what to do. But I don't buy the "they should've been in closer games to prepare them". What? You're going to let off the gas just for the sake of being battle tested? Kansas just played better.

Lindsay had a fantastic weekend at her retreat. I'll let her tell more about it if she wants to, but I can tell you from watching her talk about it, listening to her talk about it, it was very filling for her heart. The theme of the retreat was "The Woman at the Well". Lindsay came back with a full bucket, and I was anxious to drink from it. While Lindsay's weekend was so filling, the last few days for me have been somewhat draining. She and I had an argument Thursday night, a lot of factors combined in that. And it was in some ways necessary and cleansing, though it wasn't any fun in the middle of it. Then the weekend, for reasons deeper than the outcome of the game, was somewhat hurtful and disappointing. I'm not going to go into detail on here, but it was sad for me in a way. So to see her come back on fire, just with a Jesus fueled sugar rush that's reminiscent of a two year old on pixie sticks, was so welcomed. Hopefully she gets a chance to come on here and talk about it. May her enthusiasm fill you up as well.

She may also be excited to know that there are no more sports to distract me from her until September. Can't stand baseball. So I'm all hers all summer. I take that back, the NFL draft is in 3 weeks. But after that, it's lots of outdoors time.

So this is the internet?

So this post won't have much to do with Colorado. I just wanted to put a picture up. I have around 1,000 pictures from my four trips. Just count on there being a picture from one of them being on each post as long as it makes sense. Or even if it doesn't.

I'm not sure that I agree with Lindsay's suggestion that doing this was my idea, unless you like it. In which case, yes. It was all me.

So this is the way we work when we go to Blockbuster. For every movie I choose, she gets to choose one too. It's just fair since our movie tastes rarely sync up. Especially last night's choice. "Pirates of the Carribean". (Is it Carr-a-be-un or Carib-e-un?!?!) Oh my Lord. So 45 minutes in I was counting the tiles in our dining room floor I was so bored. I went to get something to drink just so I could get back up for a bathroom break. I couldn't figure out who was the good guy, who was the bad guy. Everyone kept changing sides and alliances. Two hours later...that's right...two hours later....it was still going. Honestly, I've torn off one of my fingernails, fractured my nose, had countless sprained ankles. None hurt this bad. But I figure if that's the worst thing I have to complain about, I'm doing pretty well. Which I am. And I think she is as well.

If you're going to be gracious enough to pray for us this weekend, first and foremost safe travel. We're each leaving town this weekend, in opposite directions. Lindsay is going on a women's retreat with Grace. I'm so excited for her. I've been on a couple of retreats, and each have been tremendous times with God. I'm so hoping she hears from Him this weekend. No matter what, I'm so excited about her time. I'll be headed down to Greenville to stay with one of my best friends who just got himself his own home! He closed Monday and hopes to be finished signing papers by the time we get down there Saturday afternoon. Yes, we'll be watching the Final Four together, which is pretty much a mandated thing if Carolina makes it. How do I feel about UNC's chances? Simple. At this point, I'm scared of everyone. I'm very scared of a motivated "We'll show Roy he messed up by leaving us". If they're still alive in this tournament, I'm scared of them. Should Kansas win Saturday, I'm not worried about Chad or Jamie giving me a hard time on the way home. I'm driving. Well, guess I should work now.

*Disclaimer*

I just wanted anyone visiting this wonderful page to know that the "other" half of Marc started this. Marc was invloved but of course didnt choose the name or colors or anything. That is all for now. Thanks.

The Mrs.

We fell into the Trap!!!

So after seeing some friends create blogs Marc and I have created one for ourselves. We have some crazy things that happen in our lives so why not tell all of our friends about them as well. Lindsay is currently rehearsing for a musical with West Side Civic Theatre in Lewisville. The show will be outdoors and it is a very cool atmosphere. Everyone should come! Anyways enough about me! We are nervously awaiting this weekend as we count down to the UNC game. Go Heels! Of course we got married in January so we are getting to know each other differently than before because now we spend so much more time together. I think Marc did laundry maybe once a month because he has SO many clothes and of course I do not have that many yet. I do laundry almost every weekend! I am pretty sure Marc enjoys not having to eat microwaved noodles every night because now he has someone cooking for him! So anyways this is just something I could put down really quick and I guess I will start to tell more of what happens as the days go on. I am sure Marc will be on here too "Bloggin' it up!" Thats funny. Something I never thought I would say!